How to Correct Without Crushing: The Art of Calling People Up
A practical framework for delivering truth with grace, building trust, and developing people toward their full potential.
You’ve seen it happen.
Someone makes a mistake, and their leader calls them out in front of the room. Silence follows. The air feels heavy. Everyone shifts in their seats, wondering what to do next.
On the surface, it looks like accountability. In reality, it’s the leadership move that quietly destroys your best people.
Because what just happened wasn’t correction. It was humiliation.
And humiliation never produces growth.
The truth is, public call-outs don’t strengthen standards — they shatter trust. The team learns that mistakes equal exposure. The one thing every high-performing culture depends on, trust, gets replaced by fear.
And once fear enters the room, honesty leaves it.
Why Calling People Out Fails
Many leaders call people out thinking they’re doing what good leaders should do — addressing problems directly, maintaining excellence, and holding others accountable. But calling people out doesn’t correct behavior. It corrodes belief.
Research confirms it. Individuals who receive poor-quality feedback are 63% more likely to leave their organization within a year than those who receive high-quality, constructive feedback.
The issue isn’t correction itself. The issue is how we correct.
Shame-based correction traps people in their failure instead of releasing them into growth. When you call someone out, you’re talking to their mistake. When you call someone up, you’re talking to their potential.
One diminishes. The other develops.
Let’s dive into the word to get wrap our minds around this concept deeper.
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
—Ephesians 4:29 NIV
Paul’s command is clear: your words should build people, not break people. Correction is part of leadership, but even correction must carry construction. Your words are either tools that build people or weapons that wound them.
In Ephesians 4, Paul is writing to a growing church learning to live in community. He warns believers about careless speech. This is not just gossip or slander, but correction that tears down instead of lifts up.
For leaders, this principle carries weight. Correction delivered without care isn’t truth. It’s trauma.
Paul calls us to a higher standard: speak what benefits the listener. That means your correction should strengthen, not shame. Your feedback should bring clarity and confidence, not condemnation.
The right words at the right time can save a person’s potential. The wrong words at the wrong time can silence it.
The Hidden Cost of Unhealthy Correction
Calling someone out feels efficient. It sends a message. It shows authority. But what it actually does is make your best people cautious, quiet, and afraid to take risks.
Because when a person is called out publicly:
They stop thinking creatively and start playing it safe.
They shift from ownership to self-protection.
They question their value and second-guess their competence.
And this doesn’t just affect the one person. It affects everyone watching. The whole team learns that failure equals embarrassment. They learn to hide mistakes instead of fixing them.
Public correction might feel powerful in the moment, but it weakens the very culture you’re trying to strengthen.
I remember sitting in the office of a high-performing remodeling sales team I was coaching. During one meeting, the sales director corrected an employee in front of everyone for missing their quarterly target. The room went silent. The employee nodded quietly, embarrassed.
Six months later, that same employee, who was once one of their top performers, left the company.
When HR conducted an exit interview, they asked why. The answer was simple: “I stopped believing my boss was for me.”
That’s the hidden cost of calling people out. You might fix a mistake, but you lose a person.
But there’s another way to lead. A way that builds accountability without breaking people.
What It Means to Call People Up
Calling people up isn’t about avoiding hard truth. It’s about delivering truth in a way that calls someone to rise, not retreat.
Jesus modeled this perfectly.
When He met Zacchaeus, the corrupt tax collector, Jesus didn’t open with a list of sins. He looked up in the tree and said, “Zacchaeus, come down immediately. I must stay at your house today.” (Luke 19:5)
That one invitation changed everything. Zacchaeus’ transformation didn’t begin with condemnation. It began with a connection that would call him higher.
When Jesus met the woman caught in adultery, He didn’t shame her in front of the crowd. He silenced her accusers and said, “Go now and leave your life of sin.” (John 8:11)
He named the truth but did it in a way that protected her dignity. He didn’t call her out. He called her up.
Truth that builds someone up always speaks to identity before it speaks to behavior.
Why Your Team Needs You to Call Them Up
Your team doesn’t need more managers pointing out what’s wrong. They need leaders who fight for their potential.
When you call people up, you do four things that change how they grow:
You affirm identity before addressing behavior. People don’t change when they feel diminished. They change when they feel believed in.
You connect feedback to growth. Instead of saying, “You failed at this,” you say, “You’re capable of more than this shows.”
You celebrate progress, not just perfection. When you acknowledge small wins, people feel safe to keep improving.
You speak to potential, not just performance. You remind people who they’re becoming, not just what they did.
Think about Peter. Jesus corrected him often for doubting, for misunderstanding, even for trying to rebuke Him. But every time, Jesus connected the correction to Peter’s potential: “You are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church.”
Correction and calling were never separated.
The goal in leadership isn’t to avoid hard feedback. The goal is to deliver it in a way that develops.
A Framework for Calling People Up
If you want to make this a consistent part of your leadership, you need more than good intentions. You need a framework that shapes how you lead through correction.
1. Start With Identity-Based Language
When giving feedback, begin with who the person is, not what they did wrong.
Instead of saying, “This project missed expectations,” say, “You’re someone who values excellence, and this result doesn’t reflect that standard yet.”
You’re connecting their identity to their improvement. That difference changes everything. It invites ownership instead of defensiveness.
2. Create Celebration Rhythms
Don’t wait for perfect performance to recognize progress. Build rhythms of celebration into your leadership culture.
A simple “I noticed what you did this week” can reinforce growth far more effectively than a long list of corrections.
People repeat what gets recognized. So if you want more excellence, celebrate progress toward it.
3. Offer Stretch Opportunities
Calling people up means seeing their potential before they do. Give people responsibilities that stretch them slightly beyond what they think they can handle.
When you entrust someone with more, you communicate belief. And belief is what transforms people faster than critique ever could.
4. Follow Up With Belief
Correction should never be the end of a conversation. Follow up later with a question like, “How’s that going?” or “What support do you need to grow in this area?”
It communicates that your interest in their development isn’t conditional on perfection…it’s continuous.
The best leaders don’t just correct. They commit to seeing it through.
Understand this: Calling people up is not about soft leadership. It’s about strong leadership with a different foundation.
Have something we can be praying over in your life? Comment below and we’ll be sure to cover you this week!
The Leadership Shift That Changes Everything
You have a choice every time you address underperformance or missed expectations.
You can call people out, or you can call people up.
Calling out traps people in shame. Calling up inspires people to rise.
Calling out centers the problem. Calling up centers potential.
Calling out feeds your ego. Calling up builds their confidence.
Calling out might feel powerful in the moment, but calling up multiplies your impact over time.
Let me give you an example of this. Let’s say two leaders confront their teams after a missed goal.
Leader A opens the meeting with frustration. “We missed it again. This team needs to step up.” Everyone nods silently, already planning to say less next time.
Leader B begins differently. “I know this team’s capable of more than what this result shows. Let’s talk about what we learned and what we can do differently.” The tone shifts immediately. Ideas emerge. Momentum returns.
The same truth was spoken, but one leader created fear, and the other created ownership.
That’s the difference between calling out and calling up.
How to Practice Calling People Up This Week
The shift begins with intention, but it’s built through action. Here’s how you can start:
1. Audit Your Language
Review how you communicate correction. Ask yourself:
Do my words inspire ownership or defensiveness?
Am I addressing behavior or affirming identity?
Does my tone reflect frustration or belief?
Write down one phrase you tend to use in frustration and replace it with a phrase rooted in growth.
2. Redefine Accountability
Accountability doesn’t mean confrontation. It means commitment to growth. The next time you correct someone, start by reaffirming their value before naming the gap.
Example: “You’re a leader I trust with big projects. This mistake doesn’t reflect that strength, but I know you’ll fix it.”
You’re calling them back to who they are.
3. Build Recognition Into Routine
Create a rhythm in your week to celebrate progress. It could be:
A five-minute highlight moment in every staff meeting.
A personal text to one team member acknowledging growth.
A public shoutout for small wins.
Gratitude creates momentum. And momentum keeps people moving forward.
4. Correct in Private, Praise in Public
Public correction creates shame. Private correction creates trust.
If an issue arises, deal with it privately. When someone grows, acknowledge it publicly. That balance builds safety and confidence simultaneously.
5. Model What You Expect
The best way to teach this culture is to live it. When you make mistakes, own them. When you receive correction, receive it with humility. Let your team see you rise from feedback with gratitude instead of defensiveness.
Your response to correction sets the tone for how they’ll respond to yours.
Calling people out might feel bold, but it breaks trust. Calling people up takes more courage, but it builds transformation.
Jesus didn’t call people out to embarrass them. He called them up to restore them. He spoke to who they could become, not just what they had done.
The best leaders do the same.
So this week, choose to lead differently.
Choose to speak words that build instead of words that break.
Choose to see potential where others see problems.
Choose to call people up, not out.
Because the leaders who call people out get compliance. The leaders who call people up create change.
And change is the real measure of leadership.
Lead well this week, leader.
— Jared
So many in business feel that calling out someone gets rid of weaknesses. If we simply replaced that thought with positive potential and mentorship, we’d have stronger leadership and healthier outcomes.
Have to say excellent and incitefull into human behavior. Having been part of a very competitive corporate environment for years I saw this happen more then once. The flip side was being praised for achievements in such a manner that it causes others to feel defeated in their efforts. The spotlight for me was not a place or opportunity I relished at all. Lastly have to add that all this starts for all of us in childhood sadly, so parents take heed!